New Years Resolution #1: I shall not covet my neighbour's stuff!

Photo by Cynthia K

I have to admit, this is a tough one. I started off the New Year, talking to my brother (the shiny, rich, perfectly attired brother!) and he recounted his absolutely perfect New Year's celebration. He related how he and his beautiful wife had a lovely pre-New Years party at their home with drinks and hors d'oeuvres for 16 of their closest friends. Then the party posse moved to the country club down the road, where they rang in the New Year with a lavish dinner, drinks and dancing. DANG! That's the New Year's celebration I wanted. Instead, I worked at my real job until 6pm, came home dog tired, we ordered Chinese take-out, watched the ball drop on the television, went to sleep, then got food poisoning and spent the next two days in bed. Ouch.

Coveting is a difficult thing. My human frailty leads me to do it every now and again. My brother's life often seems so polished and perfect (there's that word again!) it makes me crazy. My own life seems harried, disorganized and chaotic in comparison. Their home looks like a decorating magazine. Mine looks  half-finished, toy-strewn, kid-friendly, and not too clean in comparison. I could go on and on, but you get the idea. 

Other people's lives often look great in comparison to our own. Not having a bird's eye view into their homes often makes us skew our vision of what their lives must be like. Seeing all the beautiful possessions, the tailored clothes and the shiny cars makes many people crazy! (myself included) Why can't my life be like that (or sort of like that!). 

It's difficult to take that step back, and breathe. Coveting our neighbour's stuff is human, but not particularly productive. It inhibits our own growth process. If we want to change our lives (financial, social, personal) we have to look within. Examining our history, our habits and our frailties is the first step. Only then can we get an idea of what we need to do, what goals we want to set, what steps need to be taken to improve our lives. It is possible. Just shove those covetous thoughts aside already!

«What people say, what people do, and what they say they do are entirely different things.» — Margaret Mead

Black Friday: Retail Bombardment

Even though I am not an American citizen, I am married to one, and so for that reason, we celebrate Thanksgiving twice, once in October and once in November. We also live close to the U.S. border, so it is hard not to notice Thanksgiving, and the crazy retail shopping holiday that is Black Friday. I already talked about Black Friday in a recent post, but I thought it beared repeating: the whole Black Friday phenomenon can be absolutely toxic to someone who has trouble controlling his/her spending. I am absolutely astounded at how much the media-overload seeps into your psyche. Over the last year, I feel like I have been so sure of my need to save and my aversion to spending money I didn't have seemed rock solid. But then the advertising-- print, online, television and radio-- began building a few weeks ago, and reached its crescendo this week. I could feel myself start to crumble, I started coveting all the things I could not afford. Every day a new bundle of flyers would appear in the mailbox, and I could not stop myself from eyeing all the sales. I have not buckled (yet), still resolute from my successful trip to Costco. But I can see how this environment causes people to overspend. Retailers know just what buttons to push in order to get cash-strapped, debt-burdened North Americans to spend money they do not have. It's a minefield out there!

Postscript: Happy to report I am over 200 pageviews for my blog. It may not seem like anything much, but it's a nice milestone for me. I started this blog not really knowing what I am doing (still don't really know!) but I am learning a little more each day, and I am glad to see some people are reading!